Gator Country

RayGator · 06-30-2011, 12:33 AM

The GatorTail Pub Gazette

A little News and a little Fun at times!

RayGator · 06-30-2011, 12:35 AM

Not Your Usual July and 2011

This year July will have 5 Fridays and 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. This happens just once every 823 years.

2011 will have 4 unusual dates:
1/1/11 and 1/11/11 and 11/1/11 and 11/11/11.

And now get this, take the last 2 digits of the year in which You were born, then add the age you will be this year. The results will be 111 for not just everyone in The Pub but for everyone in the whole world!

RayGator · 06-30-2011, 12:54 AM

Strange

There was a lawyer who died whose name was Strange. His friend asked the tombstone maker to make this inscription on the tombstone:

"Here lies Strange, an Honest Man, and a Lawyer."

The tombstone marker insisted such an inscription would be confusing to people passing by the marker, they would think 3 different people were buried under the same stone. But he had a better suggestion for the inscription:

"Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer".

That way when anyone walked by the tombstone and read the inscription they would certainly remark, "That's Strange!"

RayGator · 06-30-2011, 01:40 AM

The Blonde Goes To Las Vegas!

Two bored casino dealers are waiting at a craps table. A very attractive, beautiful blonde young lady comes in and wants to bet $20,000 on a single roll of the dice. She tells the dealers, "I hope you guys don't mind but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude." And with that she strips completely naked from head to toe and begins to roll the dice. And she starts hollering, "Mama needs new clothes!" Then she yells:

"I WON! YES! YES! I WON! I WON!"

Then she begins jumping up and down and hugging the dealers! With that she quickly scoops up all the money and takes off!

The dealers are staring at each other and are just dumfounded. Finally one of them asks the other one, "What did she roll anyway?" The other dealer then said,"I don't know, I thought you were watching!"

Moral of the story: Not all Blondes are dumb!

RayGator · 07-11-2011, 01:11 AM

ONE Man Can Be A Disgrace

TWO Men Can Form A Law Firm

THREE Men Can Form A Congress

- John Adams

RayGator · 07-11-2011, 01:21 AM

USA Today Snapshots

Who Pays Top Dollar To Fly?

ZIP Codes Where The Most First Class Tickets Costing At least $2,000 Were Purchased From January through May 2011

1. 90201 Beverly Hills, California

2. 06830 Greenwich, Connecticut

3. 94027 Atherton, California

4. 33480 Palm Beach, Florida

5. 19041 Haverford, Pennsylvania

RayGator · 07-11-2011, 01:33 AM

Sleeping In The barn

A Hindu Priest, a Jewish Rabbi and a Lawyer were all traveling together and came upon an Inn with only 2 rooms available. The Innkeeper said that one of them must volunteer to sleep in the barn. The Hindu Priest volunteered but 2 minutes later there was a knock at the door. The Hindu Priest said, "I can not sleep in the barn because there is a cow there." The Rabbi then volunteered to sleep in the barn. Two minutes later there was another knock at the door. The Rabbi returned saying, "I can not sleep in the barn because there is a pig in there." The lawyer then volunteered to sleep in the barn. Two minutes later there was a knock at the door. It was the cow and the pig.

RayGator · 07-12-2011, 08:20 PM

Bumper Sticker I saw today:

DRIVER HAS NO CASH
He's Married

GatorPrincess8 · 07-12-2011, 11:19 PM

"And now get this, take the last 2 digits of the year in which You were born, then add the age you will be this year. The results will be 111 for not just everyone in The Pub but for everyone in the whole world!"

nope, this is inaccurate.

anstro76 · 07-13-2011, 01:12 AM

^^^worked for me

GatorPrincess8 · 07-13-2011, 01:14 AM

mine ended up being 112.

orangeblueorangeblue · 07-13-2011, 08:18 AM

Try doing that for someone born after 2000.

Speedofsand · 07-13-2011, 04:04 PM

I'm in OIA, waiting to fly to Akron. They ask for volunteers to a later flight, offering a free round trip ticket. I'm discussing it with the little woman, they start boarding and announce 2 free round trip tickets per passenger, we jumped up! Took a 4 hour delay basically. Had tasty wings at Outback in the terminal watching Abby Gator kick the winning goal. BOOM !!