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Too little Smiles & Laughs on THFSG Ver. 3.0

Discussion in 'Too Hot for Swamp Gas' started by OklahomaGator, Jul 16, 2018.

  1. gatorknights

    gatorknights GC Hall of Fame

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    Hope this isn't too risque, but I just spit my ice tea all over the screen.



    My lower region is hurting just thinking about it.
     
    • Funny Funny x 1
  2. gatorpika

    gatorpika Premium Member

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  3. gatorpika

    gatorpika Premium Member

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  4. g8trjax

    g8trjax GC Hall of Fame

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    [​IMG]
     
    • Funny Funny x 4
  5. RayGator

    RayGator Moderator VIP Member

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    Ziggy 2.8.19
    .Tom Wilson & Tom II.

    So, Ziggy is standing in front of business building.

    And The Entrance Sign on the Left Side says:

    FRIENDLY.
    FINANCE.
    COMPANY.

    And The Entrance Sign on the Right Side says:

    UNFRIENDLY.
    COLLECTION.
    AGENCY.

    :)
     
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  6. gatorknights

    gatorknights GC Hall of Fame

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    [​IMG]
     
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  7. citygator

    citygator Premium Member

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    Charlotte
    Am I the only one wondering how does the top get toasted?
     
  8. ValdostaGatorFan

    ValdostaGatorFan GC Hall of Fame

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    [​IMG]
     
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  9. ValdostaGatorFan

    ValdostaGatorFan GC Hall of Fame

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    [​IMG]
     
  10. flgator2

    flgator2 GC Legend

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    [​IMG]
     
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  11. flgator2

    flgator2 GC Legend

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  12. flgator2

    flgator2 GC Legend

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    [​IMG]
     
  13. flgator2

    flgator2 GC Legend

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  14. gatorpika

    gatorpika Premium Member

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    You put the paddles on top, yell "clear" and press the button.
     
    • Fistbump/Thanks! Fistbump/Thanks! x 1
  15. citygator

    citygator Premium Member

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    Charlotte
    I want them!
     
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  16. gatorpika

    gatorpika Premium Member

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    A blonde city girl named Amy marries a Colorado rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, "The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows, so I drove a nail into the 2x4 just above where the cow’s stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?"
    The rancher leaves for the fields. After awhile, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. “I came to inseminate the cow,” he said. Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows, and when Amy sees the nail, she tells him, “This is the one right here.” The man, assuming
    he is dealing with an airhead blonde, asks, “Tell me, lady, 'cause I’m dying to know. How would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?”
    “That’s simple,” she said. “By the nail that’s over its stall,” she explains very confidently. Laughing rudely at her, the man says, “And what, pray tell, is the
    nail for?” The blonde turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on,” she replied.
     
  17. gatorpika

    gatorpika Premium Member

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    A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, ‘When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah’. The teacher asked, ‘What if Jonah went to hell?’ The little girl replied, ‘Then you ask him’.

    A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, ‘I’m drawing God.’ The teacher paused and said, ‘But no one knows what God looks like.’ Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, ‘They will in a minute.’

    A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to ‘honour’ thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, ‘Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?’ From the back, one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, ‘Thou shall not kill.’

    One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, ‘Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?’ Her mother replied, ‘Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.’ The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, ‘Mummy, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?’

    The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. 'Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, He’s a doctor.’ A small voice at the back of the room rang out, ‘And there’s the teacher, she’s dead.’

    A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, ‘Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.’ ‘Yes,’ the class said. ‘Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?’ A little fellow shouted,‘Cause your feet ain’t empty.’

    The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: ‘Take only ONE. God is watching.’ Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
    A child had written a note, ‘Take all you want. God is watching the apples…’
     
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  18. RayGator

    RayGator Moderator VIP Member

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    “Wrinkled was Not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.”
     
  19. rivergator

    rivergator Too Hot Mod Moderator VIP Member

    Apr 8, 2007
    A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional booth, sits down, but says nothing.
    The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but the drunk continues to sit there.
    Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall.
    The drunk mumbles, "ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either!"
     
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  20. Bazza

    Bazza GC Hall of Fame

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