Some notable women think the #metoo movement has gone to far

Discussion in 'Too Hot for Swamp Gas' started by ursidman, Jan 9, 2018.

  1. gatornana
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    gatornana Administrator VIP Member

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    From reading TH over the years, I thought Christians valued the role of wife and mother.....here it's being diminished to just a ball and chain.
  2. ncbullgator
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    ncbullgator GC Legend

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    There is much to discuss. On the topic of mom/wife versus ball and chain, quite frankly, there is a bit of both. While men often speak of “happy wife, happy life” , not enough women give credit to their husbands for their contributions to the relationship. The only time that value is recognized is when the judge crushes the man financially. As Tina Turner said, “what’s love got to do with it?” On the subject of ball and chain, any man who lets his wife dictate whether he can go fishing with friends or play golf within reason, is a doormat. Ditto for a husband to order his wife to the same. How about a show of respect and gratitude by both spouses towards each other?
  3. OaktownGator
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    OaktownGator Guardian of the GC Galaxy VIP Member

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    I don't know what it is, but some people have a need to put down others no matter the topic... or to play the victim no matter the topic. The nature of this forum may bring it out.

    But no reason guys can't have good relationships with their wife and with other friends. These two things aren't mutually exclusive.

    The whole #metoo movement probably does have some guys scared who have said inappropriate things in the past or otherwise treated women poorly in the workplace. And because of that, they question themselves around women now and over react in some of the ways we see here. And some probably just didn't have any respect for women to begin with... like our current POTUS.
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  4. OaktownGator
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    OaktownGator Guardian of the GC Galaxy VIP Member

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    That is something we all should be able to agree on.

    The premise of guys just hanging with each other and staying away from women that was brought up earlier in the thread doesn't allow for that though, does it?
  5. ncbullgator
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    ncbullgator GC Legend

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    Agree. However, his argument about male/female relationships from work is spot on. They are dead. I met my wife at work. Lawyers and bad behavior have destroyed that connection.
  6. tilly
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    tilly Superhero Moderator with bulletproof posts! VIP Member

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    Of course...but if the second mans hug is innocent in nature he is not a criminal. He did not assault her. He should not have his job and reputation stolen.

    Thats akin to saying its a crime, and worthy of prosecution, to walk into a store on a cold day with a hoodie on just because another guy did so while robbing it.

    I certainly sympathize with her pain ...but that doesn't make the second man an abuser of woman worthy of a social media call out that could destroy him.

    This is my whole point. Nothing more...nothing less.
  7. gatornana
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    gatornana Administrator VIP Member

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    If there are couples where they are ordering each other around then there's something wrong in the marriage. They're not behaving as partners. If gratitude, love and respect are absent as you state here, then it's a marriage problem not a condemnation of women, wife and mothers.
  8. tilly
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    tilly Superhero Moderator with bulletproof posts! VIP Member

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    I am happily married and cultivate whatever activities I want...As does my wife of 18 years.

    She hates football. I hate pottery barn. So guess what she does while I watch football.

    It's called love. It's pretty neat.
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  9. ncbullgator
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    ncbullgator GC Legend

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    Both spouses have a right to demand respect and gratitude. Too many men are weak at reminding wives that they contribute plenty to the team.
  10. gatornana
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    gatornana Administrator VIP Member

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    Like I said above, if this is the case, then there's problems in the marriage.
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  11. ncbullgator
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    ncbullgator GC Legend

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    One of best friends got a divorce recently. My wife and I had dinner with them. She publicly berated him for not accepting a new job immediately (he was a corporate CFO and is periodically let go) and for not buying her a beach house. This man works his ass off while she played tennis every day with her friends. She was shocked when he filed for divorce. Totally clueless.

    Of course he got hosed by the judge.
  12. gatornana
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    gatornana Administrator VIP Member

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    Like I said, marriage problems. He married a bitch.
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  13. gator_lawyer
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    It's not analogous. If that's akin to anything, it's being a male supervisor of someone who was harassed or assaulted by their last male supervisor. You haven't done anything wrong simply by being that.

    I don't care if the guy is a criminal or not (because he's not getting charged criminally, but that's not the conversation). His hug is inappropriate for work, and he will have to deal with the consequences for it. That's the risk you run. If you don't feel comfortable taking that risk, don't hug people. It's that simple. But don't blame the other person for being bothered by your hug. There are a million ways to express yourself without putting your hands on another person in an unwanted manner.

    Frankly, you continue to sit here and say that the social media call out can destroy that man. How many people are out there leading an internet lynch mob against a man simply for a relatively innocent hug?

    The movement is allowing women to tell their stories. The opportunity is there for you to learn from these stories and try to understand them. Instead, you seem intent on ignoring and dismissing the ones that aren't severe enough for your taste. All you need to do is acknowledge why a person might feel that way and make an effort not to engage in unwanted touching towards employees or co-workers. It's not difficult.

    If you do that, what do you have to worry about?
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2018 at 4:12 PM
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  14. gator_lawyer
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    That's inaccurate. The relationships that are dead are the ones that aren't mutual.
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2018 at 3:24 AM
  15. gator_lawyer
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    It sounds to me like you aren't afraid of women. You are bitter about the way they treated you and hate them for it. You gotta get over that, man. You're missing out on a lot in the world because you are treating women as one, rather than as individuals.

    How much do you know about family law? Could you just not like the law rather than the judges being biased?
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  16. ncbullgator
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    ncbullgator GC Legend

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    And mutual can be interpreted in many ways.

    Ask Human Resources. Ask the Board of Directors.

    Ask a lawyer.
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2018 at 5:13 PM
  17. ncbullgator
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    If there were 12 male judges, do you think there wouldn't be screams of bias from the women's attorneys?
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2018 at 6:19 PM
  18. mdgator05
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    Just a thought, but perhaps stable women weren't attracted to your attitudes towards women. If the issue was purely an attractiveness issue, you wouldn't have gotten to first dates. When you made it through the first few dates but no further, a lot of that has to do with what you said on those dates. Not because it took them 3-4 dinners to figure out that they weren't physically attracted to you enough to go out on date #4 or #5.
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  19. gator_lawyer
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    That wasn't a response to you, and it wasn't a personal attack.

    I don't care about whether there would be complaints of bias. I care about whether those complaints are warranted. People who lose in court cry bias all the time. It doesn't mean there's merit to that opinion. That returns us to my question: How much do you know about family law?

    Based on all of the absolutely crazy things you say and believe, I'm glad you don't think I'm sane.
  20. lacuna
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    lacuna The Conscience of Too Hot VIP Member

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    I've never been under the illusion I could change anyone. All change must come from within, with the first step towards normalcy coming from the recognition there is a problem in need of correction. On your December 7th 'body camera' thread you exposed an aspect of your personality so pathological that several forum regulars urged you to seek professional help for it. That advice still stands.

    You parrot the misogynist line, smearing all women with a broad brush dipped in anger and bitterness. Your contempt is palpable.

    How so?
    Vindictive, too.

    Get help.
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