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Discussion in 'Too Hot for Swamp Gas' started by GatorAbe7, Jul 18, 2013.
working on 30 years and I have ZERO regrets
THIS says it all about marriage. :wink:
Relax ladies & gentlemen...jk!
Wait...I missed it....you illustrated that post with an actual photo of the girlfriend? :whoa:
Ideally women and men define and complement one another. The feminist game plan changed all that and now the sexes are more likely to compete and game each other. Many men are fed up with the situation and in self protective mode have learned to go their own way.
Many are disgusted with women raised in Western culture and some of them actively seek wives from places where females are not influenced by hedonistic self indulgence. I don't know if you are aware of it or not but there is a huge men's movement that counters the destructive feminism that largely contributes to the increase in divorce, pornography and abortion among other ills.
Here is but a small sample of what angry, frustrated men are thinking and saying:
you sure that women were meant to be the ideal version of what men essentially want them to be?
"ideal" is a concept....how would one actually know with absolute authority what role men and women are supposed to play?
i have trouble judging marriage simply by how often you get laid
We are defined by what we aren't as much as what we are. Men and women are decidedly different in appearance and temperament. Anyone who has raised both male and female children will confirm there are differences apparent that have nothing to do with gender conditioning.
I'm not sure of anything regarding what other people consider "ideal" in a mate because as you say "ideal" is a concept and we each have our own views and convictions. I know what works for me and I know it might not - or will not - work for others with less traditional values.
I do happen to believe most men seeking marriage want to contract one that provides them with what they are seeking in marriage. Faithfulness; exclusivity; a loving and agreeable companion; a willing sexual partner; children; domestic tranquility among other things. I think men might be opting out of marriage because they aren't finding women that can live up to their expectations or are willingly to to unselfishly meet their needs.
couldn't the same be said vice versa?
Sure, but from my own perspective I'm biased enough to believe women have more of an incentive to be married than do men. Women as childbearers are more vulnerable than men. Physically women need men more than men need women. The one reason men need women is to provide them with children and satisfy their sexual desires. And all of us know a man can easily handle his sexual needs without the presence of a woman. Not all men want children. Nor do all women, but the innate orientation of a female is towards having children. As I mentioned in the previous post, boys and girls are temperamentally different. If you place a girl child in a room with toy trains / cars and dolls, the great majority of the time the girl will gravitate towards the dolls unprompted. It's what she wants. It's what satisfies and affirms how she sees herself.
I can't off hand recall the title of a book that came out just a few years ago but a woman who had put off marriage in favor of career came to belatedly realize when she reached her 40's she had made a grievous judgmental error. When she was in her 30's she couldn't find a man to meet the criteria she required in a husband. None of them were "good enough."
While still in her 30's as she had approached 40, she realized the opportunity to have a child was disappearing so she opted to conceive the child she desperately wanted through A.I. Her thinking was to concentrate on finding a suitable marriage partner after she had the baby she wanted but in saddling herself with a child she consequently further diminished her own value in the sexual marketplace. As an aging single mother she came to realize there are many men who are "good enough" but never given the chance, or a second look, by narcissitic women who think they deserve an alpha specimen of the highest quality. Sad.
This is a pretty harsh indictment of men. They only marry for sex and procreation? This bears no relationship to my marriage.
I'm happy for you dyno, but it is fact men can provide for themselves every need in life but one. A child. And for that, they need a woman.
I remembered more about the book I mentioned in the previous post. I haven't read the book but did read the original article in 'The Atlantic' by Lori Gottlieb.
We are all just a bunch of monkeys that learned to talk. Don't forget it people.
The complexities of marriage in today's Western culture know no bounds.
Nothing like forcing a man to marry a woman he does not love just because she has his child.
Actually, it might be that men don't get married because women don't want to get married.
And nowadays women don't need men except for procreation and sometimes sex. Watch out when we figure out how to clone humans. They won't need us then.
I'm thinking more along the lines of the companionship of a soulmate.
What a novel concept!