The SEC: One big, awkward, not-so-happy family…

There are two things that are pretty much universally hated in life. Business meetings and awkward, forced photos. Always at the forefront of college athletics, the Southeastern Conference provided the blogging world with some excellent ammunition by combining both on Thursday afternoon.

Below is the photo the league tweeted, which features the 14 SEC coaches and league commissioner Mike Slive.

Let’s have a little fun with it.

First off, what exactly is Steve Spurrier thinking? He looks like he’s debating whether to punch Mike Slive or crack open an original Coors and take his shirt off for the picture. Wouldn’t be the first time.

On the other hand, Gene Chizik looks about as happy to be there as Spurrier looks pissed off. While Auburn claims he just had shoulder surgery, it’s pretty obvious Chizik is holding a briefcase full of cash under his jacket. The only question is whether it’s for the next Cam Newton or for “Pimp My Ride” to detail the Tiger Prowl.

No worries, Chizik’s choice of a windbreaker and tennis shoes didn’t leave the SEC without black leather since Will Muschamp pretended he was John Travolta. Something tells me Olivia Newton-John won’t be able to handle the Muschamp stare, though.

Les Miles’ shoes worked for his outfit about as well as Jordan Jefferson worked for the LSU offense in the national championship game. Somewhere Bobby Hebert is asking himself a four-minute long question about whether Miles would have been better off wearing a nice black pair of Oxfords.

Gary Pinkel seems to be trying to figure out how the grass-eater next to him won a national championship, while Nick Saban somehow towers over him (lifts?) a few feet away. Ironically, Pinkel’s not sure which coach he’s more scared of going up against.

You can’t quite tell from the picture, but Dan Mullen is actually wearing full-length Mississippi State pajamas.

As you can tell by now, I suck at writing comedy. Feel free to add your own quips below and let me know where I missed a golden opportunity!

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